Long Distance Friendships
Going away to college is hard. Although I love being at NYU and being in New York City, being away from loved ones is definitely one of the hardest parts of going to an out-of-state university.
College brings about a lot of tests: learning to adjust to a new lifestyle and routine, juggling a social life and schoolwork, relationships, making new friends, and one of the most important ones in my book, maintaining old friendships. See, a lot of people talk about long-distance relationships and how to make a long-distance relationship work. But, what about long-distance friendships? Although I love and cherish the friends I have made here at NYU, I still find it important to maintain the friends I have from back home. I have friends all over the place at college: Texas, Indiana, Georgia, and back home in Florida. In my group of friends from high school, nine of us left Miami and four stayed, so I’d say we’re pretty spread out. So, I’ve thought about the things that I do that make long distance friendships work. Here are some ideas on how to maintain a healthy friendship even when you are far away:
GET CREATIVE!
My best friends and I love to talk to each other every day, or as often as possible. But with our busy schedules, sometimes we don’t always have time to FaceTime or even text in our group chat. What we’ve recently been doing is we’ll send videos in our Snapchat group chat just talking to each other and giving updates. This is our creative way of still being able to update each other without cutting into our other commitments. This is effective cause we can each do it on our own time (I will usually send videos as I’m walking to and from class) and the rest of us can just watch them and respond whenever we have time. It’s kind of our own little form of vlogging (another good idea) so it’s a fun way to keep up with my best friends!
CHECK IN AND GET UPDATES!
Sometimes, there isn’t always time to talk to my friends every day or even every few days. Good friends understand that this doesn’t mean you don’t care about them or the friendship, but that things can get busy and crazy at times. That’s why another important thing to do is to randomly text your friends just to check in and see how they’re doing. Every once in a while just making sure you’re friends are doing okay and seeing what’s going on in their life makes them know that you’re thinking of them and reminds them that you’re there for them. There are little ways you can do this too - you could send them a Tweet you think they’d like while you’re scrolling on Twitter, you could give them a call, or you could even send them a letter (snail mail style) as a nice surprise!
MAKE TIME!
Making time means a few things. For one, set aside some time to talk to your friends. You could set a time during the week where you all aren’t busy and have a group video chat. However, being a good friend also means being understanding if something comes up last minute and one of your friends can’t talk - it happens. Making time also means making sure you and your friends have the opportunity to spend time with each other when you’re all in town. My friends and I have a Friendsgiving and a Friendsmas every year, and we’ve kept that tradition even now that we’re in college. We try to plan it on a day where everyone can make it and make sure we all get to spend time together. Even just hanging out and doing things when you’re back home for breaks like going bowling, to the movies, or just hanging out at a friend’s house.
VISIT!
This one may not be the easiest to do, but if you’re able to do so, definitely take the time to visit your friends at their colleges! My two best friends visited me last year and we had a blast of a weekend. I also had three other friends visit me (all at different times) and each time was so much fun. Although it can be expensive to go visit someone, if you plan ahead and make sure to get good deals, I think it’s definitely worth it. Visiting a friend at their school not only gives you the opportunity to see each other and spend time together, but it lets you learn about their school and experience a new atmosphere.
Although some of these may seem like common knowledge, sometimes we forget to make time for those we care about in the midst of our busy lives. These just serve as some reminders and tips on how to make sure your long-distance friendships last!
